bye bye sunshine!
Traveling is not conducive to blogging one might say, but I do not consider this a bad thing necessarily. It has been interesting to say the least, but I find the fact that I wake up at the same time as Kemper when he is going to his Airforce class at like 6 in the morning slightly disturbing (although in my defense my body DOES think it is an hour later).
While he goes to class in the morning I have taken it upon myself to not sit in his tiny dorm room and listen to the rain, so despite my lack of a key to get back in I layered up and set out in search of coffee!
I am a strong believer in seasonal affective disorder, and I can tell it is really getting to kemper. The break from the sun is kind of nice for me (at least at this point) but I have never seen him so worn out and lackluster. It is probably not as pronounced when I am not around because he feels comfortable confiding his frustrations to me, but I just want the happy boy I know and love back!
Another thing cloudy environments brings about in my brain is contemplation.
Right now I am at a point in my life where there are certainly a fair deal of things for me to think about. We are in college, these years are the most important in our lives. We are in between the abiding by constraints of our family and being limited by the constraints of adult obligation. I love having nothing else to worry about except enriching my life through study and travel, with no one to answer to if I come home wasted at 4 in the morning yet finding myself still WANTING to get up and go to class the next morning.
Today, I am thinking about my current relationship status. Some might find it beyond tacky that I am choosing to write about this on a BLOG (and I would agree with you to some extent) but I am too lazy to keep a journal so this is the closest thing I’ve got to sorting out all these clashing thoughts.
Long distance relationships are absolutely impossible: they are draining and make everyone involved miserable. In my opinion, the largest and most important part of a relationship is actually being with one another, so I think we did the right thing by breaking up. Obviously we have been a part of each other’s lives for over four years (and together for two and a half) but I like that we are free to do what we want with who we want when we are apart, and enjoy each other’s company when we have the chance to be with one another. It is difficult to hear about the other people that we encounter but I know at the end of the day we are the best for each other.
I have to keep reminding myself that there will be other girls and boys, I certainly don’t want to miss out on the dating experience of college, but the person that I honestly care about at the end of the day is my best friend (the other one, not jenny hahah). If it is meant to be, then it will happen but for now I am just working on enjoying who I am with wherever that might be. I will never get this week back in my life, so I do NOT want to waste it by dwelling on unpleasantries.